A Killer Turns Healer

In my previous blog post, the first inspired by my visit to Rwanda with The Goboka Rwanda Trust    https://sites.google.com/site/gobokarwandatrust/home , I promised you that I would share a truly amazing story of a killer who turned healer.  Here it is in the words of Anastase Rugirangoga.  Anastase told us this story whilst we sat in the gardens of the Hotel Des Mille Collines (our only luxury on the trip was to have a drink in these fine surroundings whilst we checked in for our flight home).  This Hotel was featured in the film Hotel Rwanda. The hotel Manager Paul Rusesabagina gave refuge to 1000 Tutsi people during the genocide. 

You may be interested to hear that when many churches failed to be places of refuge, and infact became places of mass murder, this luxury hotel provided safety for many people because of the bravery of Paul Rusesabagina.

Thousands of people were imprisoned after the Genocide of 1994 and in 2003 the President released some of those prisoners - particularly old or sick people.  Releasing prisoners meant that they often returned to their villages.  At the same time the government reduced the sentence for those genocide suspects who pleaded guilty and confessed and many who confessed were also released.

Releasing prisoners brings the killers back into the lives of the victims and brings fear into these villages and yet there was no alternative.  In a country the size of Wales people live side by side.  Every inch of Rwanda is cultivated and people live and work in every inch of the country.  There is no alternative for the victims and killers to be living and working side by side.  This means that the process of healing and reconciliation is practiced daily.  There is no viable alternative for the Country,  the people of Rwanda have live and work with each other and this requires reconciliation which in turn requires forgiveness.

Here's what Anastase (in the foreground of the photo) told us: 

In a Rwandan district called Mageragere A released prisoner (a killer in the genocide shown in the photograph taken at the time of the workshop, with the blue shirt) called Mr. Kayatera is now a neighbour of Josephine Kaneza (in the yellow dress) who survived the genocide.  Mr Kayatera had killed Josephine's family members and now wanted and needed her forgiveness to live and be accepted back into his village.

When asked for forgiveness Josephine screamed and then told Mr Kayatera ‘I will never forgive you’.

During the PHARP (Peace Healing and Reconiliation Project) workshop some other released prisoners asked forgiveness from offended survivors and were forgiven, but not Mr Kayatera.  The workshop brought about good outcomes for all except Josephine and Mr Kayatera, working groups were set up comprising of released prisoners and genocide survivors.

A few weeks after this workshop Josephine’s son fell ill and was so poorly that it was feared he would die.  Local people told her
that Mr Kayatera had a great knowledge of local herbs that he could heal sickness.  Josephine refused to acknowledge this.  She could not bring herself to approach Mr Kayatera.  

Her friends and neighbours supported her encouraging her to explore the possibility that Mr Kayatera could save her son.  Eventually, Josephine approached Mr Kayatera.  He used his knowledge of herbal medicine and her son began to recover.  He made a full recovery.  

A week after the recorvery of her son, Josephine came to meet me and said "do you know that what you taught us has begun to
bear fruit? Now I go to Mr Kayatera’s and he comes to my house." She began to recount to me what had happened.
It was very exciting. She told me that the physical healing of her son was the beginning of her trauma healing
process and that her relationship with Kayatera was growing healthily. Their relationship encouraged many other
people in Mageragere community to work together to promote forgiveness and reconciliation and to build
peace.

Today, there are in Mageragere community two mutual support groups involving more than 200 people (genocide survivors and forgiven killers) who work together on the land to produce food for their families. The trust that has grown between the people is illustrated by the tools they use together, including machetes that were used in the genocide as the weapon of choice for killing people. Today they are used in the garden, and survivors and perpetrators are not afraid when using them together. Their groups have become
spaces for mutual healing. while PHARP continues to provide guidance.

We need to learn that “no one is self and no one is safe”. This is my translation of a Kinyarwanda saying 'nta ngizi yigize’. It means, “no one is self-sufficient and no one is immune from vulnerability”. We need each other whatever happens in our communities. We need to be aware that a human being is a moral being. They have both good and bad in them. Creative opportunities are needed to help people develop the good that is in them.

In Rwanda a Hutu killer is helped to develop the will of repentance and ask for forgiveness, and the Tutsi survivor is helped to develop the will of forgiveness, and reconciliation is the result. Where there is a will, there is a way. Peace builders and mediators are key players in paving the way for reconciliation and peace building. So we should take up our role with courage and optimism.

Anastase Rugirangoga
PHARP-Rwanda.

This story is repeated throughout Rwanda.  On the final day of our trip we visited the Village of Butembo with Bishop Samuel Kayinamura.  Bishop Samuel's family were killed there in the Genocide along with 10,000 other people.  I will share this story with you in the next blog post.  It's a very powerful story of forgiveness and reconciliation.

How this applies to our work as Coaches!

I hope you find this story as inspirational as I do. I have learned much on my trip to Rwanda.  I've learned how Coaching Processes are key to personal change and that forgiveness is possible under the most extreme circumstances.  In this story of forgiveness, 'need' was the key to enabling reconcilation to take place.  In our coaching processes here at Simply Changing, we are constantly working with our Coachees on 'readiness for change' and need is one of the ingredients in Rwanda that create the conditions that bring about each individual's readiness to reconcile and heal.  

In this story we hear that Josephine required time to come to terms with the fact that Mr Kayatera was the only person she had access to who could save her son.    So, here are just a few parallels to the Coaching processes we learn which are evident in this story.  Good coaching transforms lives!

Please do let me know your thoughts.

Louise x

louise@simplychanging.co.uk
www.simplychanging.co.uk
0333 800 7777